Home Lifestyle That is our custom.

That is our custom.

In a small Jewish community, there was a problem: should people stand or sit when reciting the prayers?

Every time they got to the prayers, half the people stood and the other half sat. The ones standing would shout, “Stand up! Stand up!” The ones sitting would shout, “Sit down! Sit down!” And the prayer would always end in chaos and argument.

Realizing they couldn’t go on like this, they went to a great rabbi and asked him, “Are we supposed to stand or sit during the Kaddish?” The rabbi looked into the sources and authorities, and ruled: “There’s no biblical requirement—it depends on the custom of your community.”

“But how can we know what the community’s tradition was?” they asked.

“Ask one of the founders of your community,” the rabbi replied. “See what they did back then.”

So the congregation found a 90-year-old man, one of the original members of the community who no longer came to services, and they sent a delegation from both sides to ask him.

“Are we supposed to stand?” asked the standers. “No!” said the old man. “That was not the community tradition!” The sitters beamed. “So we’re supposed to sit?” “No!” the old man answered again. “That wasn’t the custom either!”

“So what is the custom?” the delegation asked.

“Well,” said the old man, “what’s happening now is that half of you stand, half of you sit, the standers yell ‘Stand up! Stand up!’, the sitters yell ‘Sit down! Sit down!’, and the prayer ends in a mess and a big fight!” His face lit up. “THAT is our custom!”

There was once a famous Jewish court astrologer named Isaac the Great.

The King’s mistress got sick and Isaac was called in from a prediction. He happened to know a bit of medicine as well and could see that she was going to die, so thought he would take the opportunity to bolster his credibility a little.

He said, “Your Majesty, she will die in three days — it’s in the stars.”

Sure enough, three days later, she dies. The King is very angry so he blames the astrologer.

He calls Isaac in and demands, “Look into the stars and tell me the day of your own death.”

Isaac the astrologer understands that the King is going to kill him so he looks at the Horoscope with great intensity and answers, “Sir, I can’t tell exactly when, but I can see in the stars that the King will die three days after me.”

Once upon a time there was an archery contest.

The first archer, wearing a long cape covering his face, lines up in position. He takes a deep breath and fires an arrow which finds the center of the target.

Then he takes of his cape and screams: I AM……. ROBIN HOOD!!!

The crowd cheers!

The second archer with a cape lines up in position. He fires his arrow which hits the center and cuts robin hood’s arrow into two!

He takes off his cape and screams: I AM…… WILLIAM TELL!!!!

The crowd cheers!!!

Finally, a third man in cape lines up in position. He fires his arrow but it goes all wrong!!! It flies past the crowd and k*lls the king!!!

Then the man takes off his cape and screams: I AM…… SORRY!!!

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