I patted my pockets. No keys. Panic set in.
Then it hit me—I must’ve left them in the car!
Heart pounding, I bolted to the parking lot. My husband always scolds me for leaving my keys in the ignition, saying, “One day, someone’s gonna steal that car!”
Well… guess what? He was right.
The car was gone. Vanished.
Frantically, I called the police.
“I left my keys in the car… and now it’s stolen!” I confessed, feeling like the world’s biggest fool.
Then came the hardest call of all—to my husband.
“Honey… I left my keys in the car and—” I took a deep breath. “It’s been stolen.”
Silence.
Long, terrifying silence.
Then, finally, his voice—slow, deliberate, pissed.
“Are. You. KIDDING ME? I DROPPED YOU OFF!!”
My heart stopped.
Oh.
OH.
Now I was the fool.
Embarrassed, I mumbled, “Uh… can you come get me?”
His reply? “Yeah. Just as soon as I convince this cop that I didn’t steal your damn car!”
Ah, the Golden Years. Full of wisdom… and senior moments.
An elderly couple was driving across the country.
An elderly couple was driving across the country.
While the woman was behind the wheel, the couple was pulled over by the highway patrol.
“Ma’am, did you know you were speeding?” the officer said.
The woman, hard of hearing, turned to her husband and asked, “What did he say?”
“He said you were speeding!” the old man yelled.
The patrolman then asked, “May I see your license?”
The woman turned to her husband again, “What did he say?”
The old man yelled back, “He wants to see your license!”
The woman then gave the officer her license.
“I see you are from Arkansas,” the patrolman said. “I spent some time there once and went on a blind date with the ugliest woman I’ve ever seen.”
The woman turned to her husband again and asked, “What did he say?”
The old man replied, “He said he knows you!
LOL!!
