A blonde gets an opportunity to fly to a nearby country.
She has never been on an airplane anywhere and felt very excited and tense. As soon as she boarded the plane, a Boeing747, she started jumping in excitement, running over seat to seat shouting: “BOEING! BOEING! BOEING!”
As she yelled, she forgot where she was, and even the pilot in the cock-pit heard the noise. Annoyed by the goings on, the pilot came out and shouted: “Be silent!”
There was pin-drop silence everywhere and everybody started to look at the blonde and the angry pilot.
She stared at the pilot in silence for a moment, concentrated really hard, and all of a sudden started shouting: “OEING! OEING! OEING!”
One day, I asked my English teacher,
“Why do we ignore some letters in pronunciation eg. the letter H …in Hour, Honour. …etc. ???”
My English teacher said, “We are not ignoring them; they’re considered silent “……. (I was even more confused???)
During the lunch break, my teacher gave me her packed lunch and asked me to heat it in the cafeteria.
I ate all the food and returned her the empty container…!!!
My English teacher: “What happened? I told you to go and HEAT my food, you are returning me an empty container.”
I replied, “Sir, I thought ‘H’ was silent.”
A woman and a lawyer were seated next to each other on a flight. The lawyer asked if she would like to play a fun game.
The woman, tired, just wanted to take a nap, politely declined and rolled over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He explained, “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vice versa.”
Again, she declines and tries to get some sleep.
The lawyer, now agitated, says, “Okay, if you don’t know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $500.00.”
This catches the woman’s attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. “What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?”
The woman doesn’t say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer. “Okay,” says the lawyer, “your turn”.
She asks the lawyer, “What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?”
The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modern and searches the net and the library of congress, no answer. Frustrated, he sends e- mail to all his friends and coworkers, to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the woman, and hands her $500.00.
The woman says, “Thank you,” and turns back to get some more sleep.
The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the woman and asks, “Well, what’s the answer?”
Without a word, the woman reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to sleep.
