A woman decided to have her portrait painted.
She told the artist, “Paint me with diamond rings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets, a ruby broach, and a gold Rolex.”
“But you are not wearing any of those things,” he replied.
“I know,” she said.
“It’s in case I should die before my husband. I’m sure he will remarry right away, and I want his new wife to go crazy looking for the jewelry.”
LOL!!
A Man Asked His Wife.
A man asked his wife what she would like for her birthday.
“I’d love to be six again,” she replied.
He woke her up early on the morning of her birthday and they went to a local theme park.
What a day!
He put his wife on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear, everything there was!
Wow!
Five hours later, she staggered out of the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down.
They went straight to a McDonald’s, where her husband ordered a Happy Meal with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake.
Then it was off to a movie, the latest Star Wars epic, a hot dog, popcorn, soda, and M&Ms.
What a fabulous adventure!
Finally, she came home with her husband and fell into her bed.
He leaned over and lovingly asked, “Well, dear, what was it like being six again?”
One eye opened. “You idiot, I meant my dress size.”
The moral of this story:
Even when the man is listening, he’s still gonna get it wrong.
