It was his first time in the big city.
Joe, a country driver more familiar with gravel roads and tractor traffic, gripped the steering wheel with a mixture of awe and mild terror. He had never seen so many lanes, so many signs, and so many impatient horns honking all at once.
As he crept up to a busy intersection, the light ahead turned red. He did exactly what any cautious driver would do—he stopped.
And then… he waited. The light turned green. Still, he stayed put.
He stared ahead, unmoving, blinking at the signal like it was speaking a language he didn’t quite trust.
The light turned yellow. Then red again. Then green once more.
Still, nothing.
Finally, after the fourth change, a traffic officer who had been watching from the sidewalk couldn’t take it any longer. He jogged over through the chorus of car horns, tapped on Joe’s window, and gave him a polite but puzzled smile.
“Sir,” he said, “What’s wrong? Don’t we have any colors you like?”
The candidate was interviewing for a job at a phone answer center
and was asked to make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink, and Green.
After thinking about it for a couple of minutes, the reply was, “When the phone goes GREEN, GREEN, GREEN, I PINK up the phone and say YELLOW!”
She got the job.
Father O’Flannagan dies due to old age.
Upon entering St. Peter’s gate, there is another man in front of him in the queue waiting to go into heaven.
St. Peter asks the man, “What is your name what did you accomplish during your life?”.
The man responds “My name is Joe Cohen, and I was a New York city taxi driver for 14 years”
“Very well,” says St. Peter, “Here is your silk robe and golden scepter, now you may walk in the streets of our Lord.”
St. Peter looks at the Father, and asks “What is your name and what did you accomplish?”
He responds, “I’m Father O’Flannagan, and have devoted the last 62 years to the Lord.”
“Very well,” says St. Peter, “Here is your cotton robe and wooden staff, you may enter.”
“Wait a minute,” says O’Flannagan, “You gave the taxi driver a silk robe and golden scepter, why did I only get a cotton robe and wooden staff?”
“Well,” St. Peter replied, “We work on a performance scale. While you preached, everyone slept, but when he drove taxis, everyone prayed!”
