Once upon a time there was a nonconforming sparrow who decided not to fly south for the winter.
However, soon the weather turned so cold that he reluctantly started to fly south. In a short time ice began to form on his wings and he fell to earth in a barnyard, almost frozen. A cow passed by and crapped on the little sparrow.
The sparrow thought it was the end. But the manure warmed him and defrosted his wings. Warm and happy, able to breathe, he started to sing.
Just then a large cat came by and, hearing the chirping, investigated the sounds. The cat cleared away the manure, found the chirping bird, and promptly ate him.
THE MORAL OF THE STORY
1) Everyone who shits on you is not necessarily your enemy.
2) Everyone who gets you out of the shit is not necessarily your
friend.
3) And if you’re warm and happy in a pile of shit, keep your mouth
shut.
It was a typical night of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire
Regis: “Barbara, you’ve done very well so far – $500,000 and one lifeline left — phone a friend. The next question will give you the top prize of one million dollars if you get it right… but if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32,000 — are you ready?”
Barbara: “Sure, I’ll have a go!”
Regis: “Which of the following birds does not build its own nest? Is it… A-Robin B-Sparrow C-Cuckoo D-Thrush. Remember Barbara its worth 1 million dollars.”
“I think I know… but I’m not 100%… No, I haven’t got a clue. I’d like to phone a friend, just to be sure. I’ll phone my friend Maggie.”
(ringing) Maggie (also a blonde): “Hello…”
Regis: “Hello Maggie, its Regis here from Who Wants to be a Millionaire-I have Barbara here and she is doing really well on $500,000, but needs your help to be a Million. The next voice you hear will be Barbara’s and she’ll read you the question. There are 4 possible answers and 1 correct answer and you have 30 seconds to answer — fire away Barbara.”
Barbara: “Maggie, which of the following birds does not build it’s own nest? Is it: A-Robin B-Sparrow C-Cuckoo D-Thrush”
Maggie: “Oh Gees, Barbara that’s simple…..It’s a Cuckoo.”
Barbara: “You think?”
Maggie: “I’m sure.”
Barbara: ”Thanks Maggie.” (hangs up)
Regis: “Well, do you want to stick on $500,000 or play on for the Million, Barbara?”
Barbara: “I want to play, I’ll go with C-Cuckoo”
Regis: “Is that your final answer?”
Barbara: “It is.”
Regis: “Are you confident?”
Barbara: “Yes fairly, Maggie’s a sound bet.”
Regis: “Barbara…..you had $500,000 and you said C-Cuckoo …you’re right! – You have just won ONE MILLION DOLLARS. Here is your check. You have been a great contestant and a real gambler. Audience please put your hands together for Barbara.”(clapping)
That night Barbara calls round to Maggie and brings her down to a local bar for a celebration drink and, as they are sipping their Champagne, Barbara turns to Maggie and asks: “Tell me Maggie, How in God’s name did you know that it was the Cuckoo that does not build its own nest?”
Maggie: “Listen Barbara, everybody knows that a Cuckoo lives in a clock.”
